Friday, December 5, 2008


celebrity bloggers make me uncomfortable. blogging makes me uncomfortable. writing makes me uncomfortable. if one more person compares me to carrie FUCKING bradshaw i will put my head into a vice, and right before my eyeballs explode and i perish, perhaps i'll look like sarah jessica parker.

to quote my favorite manager of all time, Sir Benali, "I JOKE."

(which remind me of an evening at my ex's bar, when i arrived unannounced and he appeared to me courting a narrow-faced girl. you know? the kind of woman with a hot-dog face. i responded by ranting and raving about how i was going to go cram my head into a vice, which he interpreted as a suicide threat, but i was actually making a mean-spirited joke.)

stand-up comedy is going to get me in all sorts of trouble, isn't it?

sense of humor is more important to me than i'd like to admit. if someone is too insecure to laugh at my off-color humor, i'll never really love them. i can't love - or even like, actually - someone who i can't entertain.

"that's a bad trait," my exboyfriend used to tell me, "being unable to like people who don't like you."

"if someone isn't amused by me, why would i like them?"

he offered, "maybe there's more to life than just joking."



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